There exists among us a breed of humans who yearn to make the lives of other people better. They are made of light and they have an innate desire to project light unto the world and everyone that they meet. These are the people who you’ll often hear say “people always talk to me about their problems”. They are the volunteers, the social workers, the therapists. These light bearers want so badly to give light to others that they often sacrifice themselves in order to give it. Then there are the empaths who have all of the above characteristics and some additional ones. These are the people who either have a light so bright people are drawn to it like so many beautiful moths are drawn to the soft glow of a reading lamp, or have such an magnetic pull that the people are drawn to them by the laws of attraction. These people sometimes only need to be in proximity to another human and they know and can actually feel the emotions given off by others. Perhaps another blog deeper into empaths. For the sake of this blog I want to discuss the light bearers in general.
When you have such a strong drive to help other people you may find yourself consistently and unbelievably worn out. I know I do. Have you ever spent hours and hours talking to someone about their confidence, self esteem, or tough life situation and it seems like maybe you’ve gotten somewhere just to have that person return to the same state they were in before the talk the very next day? Is there anything more draining than that?
I once was in a situation where I was able to talk to a young person going through a very hard time. We were in basic training for the military, I was at the end and this was her very first night. She was scared, crying, and wanted nothing else but to go home. She missed her family, she thought she had made a horrible mistake. I spent what felt like hours telling her she was going to be okay, telling her she could do anything, telling her to believe in herself. After our conversation I went on my way and she went on hers. Months later while standing at an ATM on a different military base, I heard a voice call my name. She ran up to me and hugged me and thanked me for the late night conversation. She said she had made up her mind to go home until I heard her crying and made time to sit with her and talk to her. She said I gave her hope and that every time things got hard she heard my voice in her head. She excelled in basic training and I hope she is still excelling today. Full confession: I didn’t know her name not even the moment that she hugged me or when I walked away from her after the ATM. I was absolutely dumbfounded. I had no idea I could have such an impact on a person. The opposite is true as well. Sometimes I spend hours and days talking to people who just never change themselves for the better. It has always been easier for me to to blame myself or feel bad for people who don’t change than it is too feel good about helping someone who does make positive changes in their lives.
Here’s what I know and what I’m presently processing. I make time for people, I listen, I give solicited advice, and work to empower them, but that’s just planting the seed. I am not responsible for the management of the seed after it is planted, because I am not the person it has been planted in. That person is responsible for watering the seed and making sure that it gets enough sun. Some of these seeds will grow, some I will see the fruit of, some I will never know the fate of, and some will take years to grow but every single one of them is worth planting.
Here’s a another personal example. For as long as I’ve been married my husband tells me that he thinks I’m beautiful. I would always retort with “you’re crazy” or “you need glasses” or some other responses that deflected his compliment, because deep down, I didn’t believe that it was true. Then one day, he told me that he was going to stop telling me I was beautiful. I asked him why, he told me because I didn’t believe him anyway. He was not wrong, but I didn’t want him to stop. So I asked him to not stop and give me another chance. He didn’t stop, and from that day on when he told me I was beautiful I said “thank you”. He had planted the seed in me and I began to nurture it. I changed. I began to see myself through his eyes and began to believe not only that he thought I was beautiful but also that I truly am.
I guess the main point of this blog is to say, if you are a light bearer, then just be the light bearer. Not everyone is going to react the way that you would hope they do, but don’t lose that hope. Remember to take care of yourself self-care is a must for any light bearer. Most importantly, don’t give up on yourself or your light, just keep planting seeds.
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